I Have Been Crucified

“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” Gal. 2:20.

This verse would be my life-verse if I had one. It seems I can never place one jot or tittle above another. It is like preferring one of Jesus’ attributes and characteristics above another. “He is altogether lovely.” Songs 5:16.

Until we have been crucified we must each “take up his cross and follow” Him. We may have caught sight of Him in the market or the religious service at the temple and be interested in His teaching, seek His healing, desire the gaze of His loving eyes, or any other number of attractions that He has (for they are infinite). But, until we have been crucified, we are only following at a distance.

Yes, by all means, take up your cross and follow, but where does following Jesus lead? It leads to the death of me. Jesus gave his life every day that He walked the earth, then, in one swan song, He gave it up through death, even death on a cross. He faced the mysterious and mystical death whereby we still must marvel at it’s meaning.

Many followed Jesus, some closely, some remotely, some ultimately to their own death on His cross. How is your follow? Did you begin to follow and get side-tracked at one of the many theaters of worship? Did you begin to follow and see that you had something more important to do first? Did you begin to follow and grew weary of the cost to yourself?

Or are you now following, though at a distance? Are you now following when it is convenient and you “can make time” (good luck with that!)? Or are you following only when others are watching (as workers in a project get busy when others are watching)? Or are you following in curiosity and with interest to see how it will turn out for you if you go this way? There is a broad road with many following so that they intend to save their life, yet they will not lose this life so they will not gain that life.

Are you an avid disciple? Are you seeking with your whole heart, mind, soul, and strength? Are you listening to God through His Spirit? Do you have eyes that see?, ears that hear?, a heart that understands? If you do then you know what you must do. You must die to yourself.

Before the cross, Jesus said, “If anyone would come after Me, let him take up his cross, deny himself, and follow Me.”

Where are you? Are you pre-cross or post-cross? Before the cross, if you are following, you are in the continual act of denying yourself. You are in the process of dying. After the cross, you “have been crucified”. You are no longer dying, you have died. Death has a sense of finality about it. Death means separation from the Source.

In the Garden we died (in Adam) and became separated from the Source of our Life — God. Now at the Cross we must, by faith and will, die again. At the Cross we die to the source of our life —Self— and separate from Self in order to become One in Him.

What side of the cross are you on? Are you still considering dying? Are you following to see what it will cost? Are you making sure that it will go well for you? Let me assure you it will be bad for Self, very bad. If you intend to go all the way, you may as well kiss your Self goodbye. There are many who have stalled on their way to the Cross. They did not count the cost before they set out to build.

Following Christ to the Cross will cost you everything you have to give. Whatever you are trying to grasp will be asked for. (What does a dead person need anyway? Your Heavenly Father knows that you need these things.)

If you have died to Self at the Cross then you too can say along with Paul, “I am (have been) crucified with Christ.”


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